Day 29 - Charity

The freedom that comes from giving is appreciated even in the secular world.  Even agnostics and some atheists propound the idea that it is better to give than to receive.  I have thought a lot recently, about charity and giving.  I want to be more charitable, even in my thoughts and prayers.  I want for my heart to be full of joyful giving.  In moments of calm and ease I recognize that all I have was freely given and I have done nothing to earn my place in life.  It is the stressful and turbulent moments when all that goes out the window.  It is in reflecting on these moments that I realize a difference in Christianity and other religions and philosophies.  You see, it is easy in moments of great wealth and security to want to give and to look for meaning in the charity itself.  Look at the invisible children campaign right now.  Society is looking for a cause to make them feel better, but what about when you don’t have time to put others first or when things get crazy, or when you find out you were duped and that charity or cause was a fraud, or perhaps just not perfect.  Well, there is the cross.  We don’t give for the charity itself or even to make ourselves feel better.  We simply give, joyfully, because we have been given life and freedom.  And, when I find that I haven’t given or haven’t given without grumbling, I turn to the cross, knowing that I my debt has already been adjusted.  In that, there is great joy!

1 Chronicles 29:16-18

O Lord our God, all this abundance that we have provided for building you a house for your holy name comes from your hand and is all your own. I know, my God, that you test the heart and have pleasure in uprightness. In the uprightness of my heart I have freely offered all these things, and now I have seen your people, who are present here, offering freely and joyously to you. O Lord, the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Israel, our fathers, keep forever such purposes and thoughts in the hearts of your people, and direct their hearts toward you.

Today I am thankful...

291. for an unburdened heart

292. For the youth at our church

293.  For Michael and his gift relating to and communicating with the youth

294. For a rainy day

295. for RUF summer conference and how it impacted my life

296. for Holt telling Harper Ann tonight when we were reading about Jesus calling his disciples, "that Judas asparagus [Iscariot] was a really bad guy"

297. for a reminder that my goal isn't to raise good kids, but to raise Christ-centered adults

298.  for new books

299. for getting to watch Holt read to Harper Ann (especially when he acts out brown bear brown bear)

300. For Ella Fitzgerald

Day 28 - The Holtster

Matthew 26:42-44

Again, for the second time, he went away and prayed, “My Father, if this cannot pass unless I drink it, your will be done.” 43 And again he came and found them sleeping, for their eyes were heavy.  So, leaving them again, he went away and prayed for the third time, saying the same words again.


Six years ago the doctor handed me a beautiful, crying, bruised up baby boy.  After 14 hours of labor I had a tiny 9 lb. 7 oz. baby and immediately realized that I had seriously undervalued my capacity to love.  It’s cliche I know, but I was overcome with emotion, joy being the most prominent one.  I would (and still do when I have time) spend hours just staring at him.  Along with my capacity to love and the overwhelming love I felt for this tiny person, I also understood what it felt like to love something more than myself.  I would die for my child, what is more I would kill for my child.  I try not to dwell on these thoughts because I don’t like to think about the hypothetical situations that would cause me to have to execute on these truths, however, pointing these out is necessary to explain the other revelation parenthood gave me - that I had astronomically undervalued God’s love for me.  Because, for me, he gave his Son.  He not only gave his Son, but he turned his back on his Son and separated him from himself because there was no other way that we could be reconciled.  In the garden Jesus prayed for any other way and got no answer.  The sacrifice of the Father in that moment is jarring.  He could have stopped it all and with great power destroyed all those who were set to torture and kill his Son, but he didn’t.  And because he didn’t we have a perfect savior who is intimately aware of our struggle with sin and who revealed his ultimate righteousness and paid it all. 



John 16: 26-27, John 17:1-5

In that day you will ask in my name, and I do not say to you that I will ask the Father on your behalf; for the Father himself loves you, because you have loved me and have believed that I came from God.

When Jesus had spoken these words, he lifted up his eyes to heaven, and said, “Father, the hour has come; glorify your Son that the Son may glorify you,  since you have given him authority over all flesh, to give eternal life to all whom you have given him. And this is eternal life, that they know you the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent.  I glorified you on earth, having accomplished the work that you gave me to do.  And now, Father, glorify me in your own presence with the glory that I had with you before the world existed.



Today I am thankful...

281. That he did what I could not do, out of love gave His Son, to pay for me and my children

282. for staying up too late to watch one of my favorite movies Giant

283. for glass bottle cokes (and root beer)

284. for the first official day of spring

285. that Harper Ann was so easy to potty train (she's been completely pull-up free - yes, even at night - since October) 

286. that our kids have Nana (Jonathan's aunt Jenny) in town to play with

287. for Holt's joy tonight riding his new bike to the checkout lane at walmart

288.  for the past six years with the sweetest little boy

289.  that I have the privilege of experiencing the unconditional love of parenthood

290. For Lucinda Williams

Day 27

March 19 is the Feast Day of Saint Joseph.  One of the traditions that I enjoyed about Catholicism is recognizing the different Saints on their respective holy days.  I know that I don't need a middle man or the intercession of the saints, but I enjoyed reflecting on these biblical and church heroes.  Today, in the Catholic church is St. Joseph's feast day and I found myself reading Matthew 1:20-21

But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.” 

What amazing faith Joseph had.  I look at my life and how easily I am discouraged or disheartened or how worried I get over really small things and here is Joseph who was a poor carpenter betrothed to a woman now with child and he embraced his role as earthly father and became a refugee in Egypt to keep him safe - knowing that he was the Son of God.  "Do not be afraid."  What a humbling thought as a Christian and a parent. 

Today I am thankful...

271. for Joseph's example

272. for our double stroller

273. for the Methodist church playground

274. for watching how excited my kids get about running through a sprinkler when we are on a walk

275. for Houston and watching my kids play with him

276. for all the times I have come so close to running out of gas, but never have

277. for leftover birthday cake for breakfast

278. for rollbamaroll.com and the other sports blogs that keep me so well informed and for spring football practice

279. for our azaleas that make the front of our house look so happy

280.  For The Band

Day 26 - in exile

Hebrews 11: 13-16

These all died in faith, not having received the things promised, but having seen them and greeted them from afar, and having acknowledged that they were strangers and exiles on the earth.  For people who speak thus make it clear that they are seeking a homeland. If they had been thinking of that land from which they had gone out, they would have had opportunity to return.  But as it is, they desire a better country, that is, a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared for them a city.

Tim has been preaching on Hebrews and I have as a result found myself, on my own, in this book a lot lately.  I skipped ahead this evening and got to these verses and began smiling.  Here were people promised a savior and perpetual outsiders and aliens, transients and now, in Christ they belong.  Here we are exiles and strangers on earth - but oh how much joy there is in knowing that Christ came and suffered and prepared the way for us. 

Today I am thankful that...


261.  this world is not my home and that Christ has prepared my way

262. for delta state baseball games

263. for the enjoyment my kids (and husband) get out of playing volleyball with leftover helium balloons.

264. for leftover hamburgers for lunch

265. for playing chase with my kids

266. for lazy Sunday afternoons

267. For picnic weather

268. for rolling in the grass and being silly with Harper Ann

269. for Holt's notes on the sermon today -  arc of the covenant, wedding rings, Jesus standing on the heart, the ten commandments, a shadow, a husband and wife, people running to God, and money (jesus paid it all) - it's all in there

270. For Emmylou Harris

Day 25 - the Trinity

Matthew 3:16-17

And Jesus, when he was baptized, went up straightway out of the water: and, lo, the heavens were opened unto him, and he saw the spirit of God descending like a dove, and lighting upon him: and lo a voice from heaven, saying, This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased

1 Peter 1:2

Elect according to the foreknowledge of God the Father, through sanctification of the Spirit, unto obedience and sprinkling of the blood of Jesus Christ: Grace unto you, and peace, be multiplied

The Trinity is weighty stuff.  I trust that some things beyond my understanding will be made clear to me someday.  I do however feel comfort and joy in knowing that there is one loving God who made us and formed us.  That Jesus is also God and Son and humbled himself to become man and suffer and that the Holy Spirit intercedes and sanctifies. 

251. For the Trinity

252. That we had absolutely beautiful weather for Holt's birthday party

253. for loving family

254. for the friendship that Irene and Holt share with one another

255. Emileigh's Bakery

256.  for St. Patrick and St. Patrick's day

Christ with me, Christ before me,
Christ behind me, Christ within me,
Christ beneath me, Christ above me,
Christ at my right, Christ at my left,
Christ in the fort,
Christ in the chariot seat,
Christ on the deck,
Christ in the heart of everyone who thinks of me,
Christ in the mouth of everyone who speaks to me,
Christ in every eye that sees me,
Christ in every ear that hears me ~ From St. Patrick's Breast-Plate

257. for Hand-me-down dresses

258. for Jane Cannon napping outside

259. for friends and family who helped us celebrate Holt's birthday

260. for Taj Mahal

Day 24 - A new self

Colossians 3:1-11

If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth.  For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.

Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. On account of these the wrath of God is coming. In these you too once walked, when you were living in them.  But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is call, and in all.

Today I am thankful...

241. That there is no caste system in Christ and that I have a new self in Christ not concerned with how I measure up to others or worldly standards, but in my walk, and that when at the end of the day I am miles from where I need to be, I can look to the cross and rest.

242. for Jonathan's willingness to drive to Oxford and pick up Holt's cake

243. for getting off work early on a Friday

244. for Harper Ann's endless supply of tutus

245. for getting to visit and giggle with Catherine

246. for my grandmother and all the spring breaks I spent at her home

247. For cotton dresses on warm days

248. for my mom's help with anything and everything I ask her to help me with and for her seemingly endless knowledge of random trivia.

249. for my cousin Stephen and his recent baptism

250. for the Ramones



 

Day 23 - Godly women

Covenant has been a blessing to us, and truly to me as a wife and mother.  Reading this in Titus caused me to pause and consider all the women in our church who have through loving example showed me how to be a better wife and mother.  I am so grateful for sound doctrine and women who gracefully teach me. 

Titus 2:1-8

But as for you, teach what accords with sound doctrine.  Older men are to be sober-minded, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, in love, and in steadfastness. Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good,  and so train the young women to love their husbands and children,  to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.  Likewise, urge the younger men to be self-controlled.  Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity, and sound speech that cannot be condemned, so that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us.

Today I am thankful...

231. For truth

232. for having known Judge Pepper - I was thinking about Judge Pepper on my way to work this morning.  I used to pass him almost every day on my way in to work (some might say I drive too fast).  I am so grateful that I I was blessed with the opportunity to work with such a kind and gentle man.  He was an abashed believer and he radiated genuineness and happiness.  I'm glad I think of him so often.

233. for Seeing tractors back in the field, tilling up the soil.

234. for Jane Cannon's growing personality

235. for drinking a diet coke sitting on the tailgate of a truck

236.  for smoked almonds

237. for XM radio

238. for the first day of the NCAA tournament and rooting for underdogs

239.  for ESPN.com's NCAABB scoreboard

240. For Buddy Holly and the influence he had on music and memories of listening to him for a month straight at my grandmother's house the summer I turned 11.

Day 22 - He taught us to pray

Luke 11:2-4

And he said to them, “when you pray, say: ‘Father, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come. Give us each day our daily bread, and forgive us our sins, for we ourselves forgive everyone who is indebted to us. And lead us not into temptation."    

One night my mom was working late and I was home alone. I was about 12 at the time and remember a feeling of uneasiness coming over me all of a sudden.  I tried to call the lab but got no answer.  A few minutes went by and then an hour, then two.  After the first 15 minutes, when the uneasy feeling lingered, I had a feeling that I should pray.  I wasn’t sure then how to pray, sometimes I still can’t find the words, but I knew the Lords prayer and said it, at first in my head and then aloud.  I prayed the lords prayer over and over again for an hour and a half.  I thought about the words and looking back, that is one of the first times that I really paid attention to what I was saying.  I remember the relief when she got home and how tight I hugged her.  Looking back I realize that there was no emergency and nothing was actually wrong, but that while I was there alone and feeling scared, He comforted me and that comfort came in the form of prayer.  It's amazing what a blip of a moment that was and how stirring and impacting it continues to be. When I can’t think of how to pray I go back to the Lord’s prayer and it is there and I find comfort.

Today I am thankful...

221. That God has taught us how to pray and that when I can’t find the words I can turn to the Word.  

222. for Holt's helpfulness - He is such an amazing big brother and sometimes I am harder on him than I should be.  I'm so amazed by his gentleness and kindness to those smaller and younger than him.

Notice the vest :-)

223. for HA's excitement over bubble baths and the way she makes herself a bubble beard

224. for the Kroger gas discount

225. for self checkout stations at Kroger

226. for air conditioning

227. playing on a pallet with a baby

228. For the feeling (however fleeting) of optimism before the NCAA tournament actually begins but after you have finished your bracket and it is still perfect.

229. That my drive to and from work involves country roads

230. for Bob Marley

Day 21

Genesis 22:1-8

After these things God tested Abraham and said to him, “Abraham!” And he said, “Here I am.”  He said, “Take your son, your only son Isaac, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriah, and offer him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains of which I shall tell you.”  So Abraham rose early in the morning, saddled his donkey, and took two of his young men with him, and his son Isaac. And he cut the wood for the burnt offering and arose and went to the place of which God had told him. On the third day Abraham lifted up his eyes and saw the place from afar.  Then Abraham said to his young men, “Stay here with the donkey; I and the boy1 will go over there and worship and come again to you.”  And Abraham took the wood of the burnt offering and mlaid it on Isaac his son. And he took in his hand the fire and the knife. So they went both of them together.  And Isaac said to his father Abraham, “My father!” And he said, “Here I am, my son.” He said, “Behold, the fire and the wood, but where is the lamb for a burnt offering?”  Abraham said, “God will provide for himself the lamb for a burnt offering, my son.” So they went both of them together. 

Today I am thankful...

211. That God provided the lamb

212. That Lucero released a new album today

213. For Election Day

214. For a clean house

215. for crawling into a made up bed at night

216. for a date night in

217. that Harper Ann has a desire to sleep in her own bed

218. When Jonathan washes the bottles for me - oh how happy the sound of him washing the bottles without me even asking makes me

219. For a night with just the girls

220. For Lucero

Day 20

Psalm 51: 13-17

Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
and sinners will return to you.
Deliver me from guiltiness, O God,
O God of my salvation,
and my tongue will sing aloud of your righteousness.
O Lord, open my lips,
and my mouth will declare your praise.
For you will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it;
you will not be pleased with a burnt offering.
The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise. 

Today I am thankful...

201. that Christ is the great sacrifice

202. for Spring Break and not having to fix Holt's lunch

203. for HA singing to Holt to calm him down - Holt Got his feelings hurt and HA started singing amazing grace. When Jonathan asked her what she was doing she said that she was just singing to Holt to keep him calm.

204. for Flip flop weather

205. for Family walks

206. that we have no homework for a week

207. for fish sticks for supper

208. that there is an extra hour of daylight for my kids to play outside

209. That Delta State has a former player coaching in the NCAA tournament

210. for The Temptations and HA requesting her and Daddy's song (My Girl) also eavesdropping on Jonathan's version when he is singing it to HA

Day 19 - being an outcast

Psalm 147

Praise the Lord!
For it is good to sing praises to our God;
for it is pleasant, and a song of praise is fitting.
The Lord builds up Jerusalem;
he gathers the outcasts of Israel.
He heals the brokenhearted
and binds up their wounds.
He determines the number of the stars;
he gives to all of them their names.
Great is our Lord, and abundant in power;
his understanding is beyond measure.
The Lord lifts up the humble;
he casts the wicked to the ground.

Today I am thankful...

191. That God builds his kingdom with outcasts and the brokenhearted

192. Holt's Vest - Holt has a cowboy vest that he puts on the second he gets home.  I can't tell you how any times I have heard, "Have you seen my vest?" and how many times I have said, "No, Holt you can't wear your vest to church, school, etc."

193. Jane Cannon's long naps

194. Daylight Savings time and my kids sleeping "late" on Sunday (Late being 7:30)

195. Enough rain on Thursday that Jonathan got to spend the whole weekend with us instead of working

196. Yard Work

197. Holt telling me that when I read about Fledge in the Chronicles of Narnia that it makes him hungry because it reminds him of that soft chewy chocolate stuff.  (Fudge?) Yeah, that stuff.

198. Selection Sunday and March Madness

199. Alabama's return to the NCAA tournament

200. The Avett Brothers

Day 18

Jonathan reads to the kids every night from one of Holt's bible story books.  I try to listen most nights when I am not busy with Jane Cannon.  It is nice that these books introduce old testament heroes to Holt and Harper Ann, but I pray that they realize that Abraham was a doubter and David a murdered and Moses reluctant and Samuel impatient and the list goes on.  My point being that they were just as needy and broken as we are and God used them.  I pray that I can teach them this at the appropriate time and in an appropriate way.  In the meantime I am thankful that I, like them, have been redeemed.

Isaiah 1:18

“Come now, let us reason together, says the Lord:
though your sins are like scarlet,
they shall be as white as snow;
though they are red like crimson,
they shall become like wool.”

Today I am thankful...

181. That my sins are washed clean

182. for a table full of little boys who can't decide if they would rather eat or play.

183. that I was able to secure Willie Nelson tickets

184. for Fishing with DD

185. For a toybox full of artillery - Holt has enough weapons to arm a small country

186. for my 2 kids napping in my lap

187. For Johnson Grass and Holt telling us not to tell grandmom that he cut his finger because she would want to clean it and stuff (Holt is not so thankful for Johnson grass - he said he couldn't figure out why God put it there)

188. A day and dinner with Grandmom and DD

189. Riding the Ranger

190. Amanda Cossey - Today the Junior Auxiliary of New Albany held a 5k in memory of a dear friend and Phi Mu sister, Amanda Cossey Price.  I, like so many others, am immeasurably thankful to have known her and had a taste of her friendship. Amanda was beautiful in a way that put everyone at ease. She was kind and gentle and strong and a litany of other adjectives that are too flippantly used that they don’t do her justice. It was impossible to know Amanda without loving her and feeling better for knowing her. I felt called to the familiar verses in Matthew 5 and the Sermon on the Mount in the wake of her death. When I met Amanda I was not a Christian, although I thought that I was. Over the course of my first semester in college I came to understand that I wasn’t going to heaven because of anything I did, or any amount of good or righteous behavior, but because of Christ’s love for sinners, for me. I read the Word and was blessed by godly men and women who prayed for me and shepherded me and led me to Christ. Amanda’s unabashed love for the Lord had a profound effect on me both before and after my heart was changed. She had a gentle joy that erupted from her smile and she was always smiling. Her warm and happy nature was so infectious that it made me want what she had, and what she had was comfort in Christ and who she was in Him. It is in Matthew that Jesus tells Christians to be salt and light. That is what Amanda was, salt and light. Salt’s value isn’t in itself, but in that it brings out the flavors in the food to which it is added. That is what Amanda did, bring out the best in those she was around. It was impossible to hold on to cynicism and bitterness around her. We are all better for having known her. She brought light into the lives of all she met and I count my knowing her amongst my blessings. It is hard in the immediate aftermath of tragedy to make sense of things, but Christ’s love for us is great and in trusting Him there is understanding. Death is the unnatural consequence of Adam’s sin, but with Christ it lost its power.

Matthew 5:8 says Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. Amanda was incredibly kind and loving and death had no power over her. I know no one more pure of heart and I know she is with Him, basking in the unfathomable glory of Heaven. Amanda was a taste of that glory for me on earth and for that I’m grateful. Our loss is heaven’s gain and because of her witness death has lost his power. I owe my life beyond this life, in part to her.

I loved seeing all photos of my phi mu sisters running and walking for Amanda.  

Bonus thanks:

Lynyrd Skynyrd

Day 17 - little children

Luke 18:15-17

Now people were even bringing their babies to him for him to touch. But when the disciples saw it, they began to scold those who brought them. But Jesus called for the children, saying, “Let the little children come to me and do not try to stop them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I tell you the truth, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child will never enter it.”

Today and every day I am thankful...

171. For Christ's example

172. for Holt's room full of little boys and spend the night parties

173. for eavesdropping on the conversations between 6 and 7 year old little boys - I wish I had kept a tally of how many times the word, "dude" was used during the course of the night.

174. for flashlights and a crisp cool night for playing flashlight tag

175. for little boys saying "force field" every five minutes

176. for uncontrollable laughter from a car full of boys

177. for visible joy on Holt's face

178. for Jonathan's gentle way of reminding me to lighten up

179. for watching a whole passel of boys watch a funny movie

180. for Loretta Lynn

Day 16

Romans 8:28–30

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.  For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers.  And those whom he predestined he also called, and those whom he called he also justified, and those whom he justified he also glorified.

Today and every day I am thankful...

161. That God has a plan for me

162. The patience of Holt's teachers

163. Crawfish

164. Rain on a Tin Roof

165. Last minute babysitters

166. Planning vacations for myself and others (if you ever need an itinerary for a 4 day trip to New York or Chicago I've got one)

167. E-mail

168. Genuine laughter

169. Screened in porches

170. Guns N' Roses

Day 15

Philippians 4:11-12, 19-20

"Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need...My God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. To our God and Father be glory forever and ever"

Today and every day I am thankful...

151. For Contentment

152. for Wednesday night fellowship and laughter

153. That sometimes God answers prayers in just the way we ask him to - tonight, sitting with the Steadmans, Bubba was going to text Jonathan and asked if he had the same number.  He said the last time they had talked on the phone was when Jonathan called to tell him that we were praying for Marsha when she was diagnosed with a brain tumor.  Then the two of them laughed about how long ago that was.  I had two thoughts, the first is that God is amazing.  Here we are laughing at what once seemed so tragic.  We prayed fervently and Jonathan and I wept for them (both of us thinking of the other) and God answered our prayers.  God is so good.  True we will face hardship and have to brave that terrain and get answers in different ways, but then let's praise him for doing just what we were called to pray for.  My second thought was how happy Jonathan's kindness makes me.  He is so kind hearted and I am so very blessed to be married to him.

154. for Harper Ann singing her songs about Jesus

155. for Holt trying to sneak toys into church

156. for being the parent instead of the kid.  I am very guilty of thinking, kids have it so easy, they don't understand how hard it is to punish them and deal with their disobedience.  Then I remember how many times today I have been disobedient to God and tried to hide my sin from him - man that's got to be hard, and it helps me sympathize with how my kid feels, how hard it must be for him to be the kid all the time.  I'm thankful for the understanding parenthood has given me and the humility my relationship with Christ gives me in my relationship my kids

157. for a mother who encouraged (sometimes forced) me to step out of my comfort zone.

158. for a husband who practices Christian discipline with our Children

159. for meeting new people

160. Uncle Tupelo

Day 14 - suffering

My life is not perfect but it is.  There is a balance to the Christian life in allowing people to see your suffering and your struggle with your affliction.  I feel like on one hand I put up a pretty nice facade that everything is fine in our life, but this is a. exhausting and b. empty.  That said, my life is a blessing, even the hardships, but I have to navigate the waters carefully, to let others know that those trials are there, but that I know they have a purpose and that God is using me or preparing me through them.  I hope that God prunes me in ways that I can lovingly and gracefully share with others when they are going through similar trials, but that I don't allow this to turn into complaining or attention seeking. 

2 Corinthians 1: 3-7

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.  For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we suffer. Our hope for you is unshaken, for we know that as you share in our sufferings, you will also share in our comfort.

Today and everyday I am thankful...

141. that God has pruned me and placed me

142. For family nights out

143. running into friends

144. listening to Holt and Harper Ann's conversations

145. Friendly strangers

146. Clean Sheets

147. New opportunities

148. living in the Delta




















149. Lost Pizza Company

150. Mumford and Sons

Day 13

My lips will pour forth praise, for you teach me your statutes. My tongue will sing of your word, for all your commandments are right. Psalm 119:171-172

Today and everyday I am thankful

131. that God is always right

132. For getting to cook supper for my family

133. That we eat supper at the table together

134. For Harper Ann's version of Grace before we eat. "tank you God for ower food, Amen" - Sometimes we'll get a random thank you for Mama and Daddy and Holt and Jane Cannon at sometime during the meal

135. That my kids dance in the kitchen with each other or stuffed animals while I am cooking, and that Holt will request "rock n' roll" songs.  Sometimes he'll say he want a really fast one.   Jailhouse Rock is a favorite.

136. That JC is such a content baby and will sit and play in her exersaucer while I fix dinner.

137.  That I have a high maintenance child like Harper Ann to make me appreciate the easiness of the others and knowing that HA will someday use her stubbornness for His glory.  Quite seriously, I have started to see Harper Ann's strong will as an incredible gift and it has changed my relationship with her and my joy in raising this girl (and resulted in thankfulness that my other two are a little calmer).

138. That Jonathan will stop and hug me for no reason in particular

139. Nights with no homework

140. Marcia Ball

Day 12 - Hope

We had small group tonight and discussed Hope and what our hope is in and what the meaning of hope is and how we think about hope.  I think I am learning to put my hope in Christ and recognize that hope is not a wish but is joy in knowing that my hope is fulfilled in Him.  I reminds me of the song we sang so often in RUF.

 My hope is built on nothing less
 than Jesus' blood and righteousness.
 I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
 but wholly lean on Jesus' name.

 On Christ the solid rock I stand,
 all other ground is sinking sand;
 all other ground is sinking sand. 

 When Darkness veils his lovely face,
 I rest on his unchanging grace.
 In every high and stormy gale,
 my anchor holds within the veil.

 His oath, his covenant, his blood
 supports me in the whelming flood.
 When all around my soul gives way,
 he then is all my hope and stay.

 When he shall come with trumpet sound,
 O may I then in him be found!
 Dressed in his righteousness alone,
 faultless to stand before the throne!

Hebrews 6:10-16

For God is not unjust so as to overlook your work and the love that you have shown for his name in serving the saints, as you still do. And we desire each one of you to show the same earnestness to have the full assurance of hope until the end, so that you may not be sluggish, but imitators of those who through faith and patience inherit the promises. For when God made a promise to Abraham, since he had no one greater by whom to swear, he swore by himself, saying, “Surely I will bless you and multiply you.” And thus Abraham, having patiently waited, obtained the promise.  For people swear by something greater than themselves, and in all their disputes an oath is final for confirmation.

Today and everyday I am thankful:

121. for Hope fulfilled 

122. For our small group and that our church has decided to try small groups on Sunday nights.  Jonathan and I have been so blessed by the comfort and openness in this fellowship with other believers.

123. for conversations with a 2 year old :-)

124. For warm a warm March and kids who want to play outside

125. for a car DVD player and headphones - It is fun to listen to the kids giggle and talk about the movie they are watching and still be able to listen to music and talk to Jonathan on a car ride.

126.  For getting to grow up in Midtown Memphis

127. Wild Flowers picked by little hands and given with big grins and bigger hearts

128. Sleeping babies in car seats - they are so cute and peaceful

129. Driving anywhere with Jonathan.  I think some of our best memories have been made on car trips.  We do a lot of laughing driving from point A to point B. Two memories jump out at me, one was when Jonathan in all honesty tried to tell me that the speed limit was 61 mph b/c that's what the sign said.  Yes, he was looking at the Highway 61 sign.  Another involved an 18-wheeler and passing a car.  I'm smiling just typing about them.

130. Little Feat  

Day 11 - Being a Hedonist

Hedonism in Christ is amazingly liberating.   It does no good to arm yourself in an argument with lovers of the world with prohibitions from the fleeting joy their idol gives them or with and threats and warnings about sin if you can't also fight it with a promise of superior happiness. I need to consume the little stream of pleasure they have in the things of this world with an ocean of holy satisfaction.  What good does it do me to tell people I am Christian if I am a miserable in my faith.  So I will eat, drink and be merry!

1 Corinthians 10:31

So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do.  Do all to the glory of God.

Today and everyday I am thankful...

111. For Christian Hedonism

112. The Gin Show and a Daddy who enjoys this!

113. Kid smiles

 

114. For the agriculture industry and Farm equipment

 

115. For Zoo trips and a zoo membership and Holt telling Harper Ann all about the Hippos (who knew he was such an expert) and Harper Ann telling me "He might be saying 'hello Harper Ann'" in her best elephant voice

116. For Carousel rides and my kids contentment when I said we only had enough money for one ride

117. For weekend trips to Memphis 

118. For a mama willing to watch all three kids so that Jonathan and I could go on a date and see the first movie we've seen in the theater in over a year. 

119. For getting to date my husband and enjoying just us time

120. For Lyle Lovett

Day 10 - The Chief End of Man

What is the chief end of man?  To glorify God and Enjoy him forever!

That is it.  Trying to find satisfaction in the finite will always leave you empty.  It’s like trying to harness the wind.  Recognizing a thing's purpose allows it to reach it’s full potential.  A sailboat on a city street does little good, but a sailboat in the open sea is glorious.  In the same way we are glorious when we realize our purpose and the infinity it offers!  My prayer today is that the Lord, help me not to be a sailboat on the street or even on the beach, but out on the waves!

Ecclesiastes 2:10-11

I gave myself everything my eyes wanted.
There wasn’t any pleasure that I refused to give myself.
I took delight in everything I did.
And that was what I got for all of my work.
But then I looked over everything my hands had done.
I saw what I had worked so hard to get.
And nothing had any meaning.
It was like chasing the wind.
Nothing was gained on this earth.

Ecclesiastes 2:24-26

A man can’t do anything better than eat and drink and be satisfied with his work. I’m finally seeing that those things also come from the hand of God. Without his help, who can eat or find pleasure?
God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness to a man who pleases him. But to a sinner he gives the task of gathering and storing up wealth. Then the sinner must hand it over to the one who pleases God. That doesn’t have any meaning either. It’s like chasing the wind.

Ecclesiastes 3:9-15

What does the worker get for his hard work? I’ve seen the heavy load God has put on men. He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also given men a sense of what he’s been doing down through the ages. But they can’t completely figure out what he’s done from the beginning to the end. They should be happy and do good while they live. I know there’s nothing better for them to do than that. Everyone should eat and drink. People should be satisfied with all of their hard work. That is God’s gift to them. I know that everything God does will last forever. Nothing can be added to it. And nothing can be taken from it. God does that so men will have respect for him. Everything that now exists has already been. And what is coming has existed before.

Today and every day I am thankful...

101. That I have a purpose

102. For Texas and my great grandmother who was a San Antonio girl and for the Bishop girls out in Houston!  Happy Texas Independence Day

 

103. For Holt's Imagination - In case you weren't aware this is not an ice chest it is in fact the Arc of the Covenant (a la Indiana Jones) - Isn't HA a cheerful little helper

104. That Jane Cannon is starting to hold her own bottle

 

105. For Kite weather and a Grandmama thoughtful enough to send my kids microkites in a special Valentines Day package

 

106. For naptime just in the nick of time

107. For our back deck

 108. That when Holt got sick in the middle of the night I was able to comfort him (and that he only threw up one time) 

109. That Holt's getting sick gave me a day to take off work and be a mommy to my kids, and that it was a beautiful day and that I have a boss who is incredibly understanding about my taking off. 

110. For Van Morrison - and a Mama who took me to see him any chance she could (and for all the Jazzfests that amounted to) and for a Husband who dances with me whenever he comes on

Day 9 - Kindness

I found myself in Matthew again today and was really encouraged.  Jonathan likes to tell me that I am opinionated, and I suppose I am.  He also likes to remind me how much I hate to be wrong, I do.  That said, I love people.  I really do.  I think about people I have debated and argued with or been at odds with and hope that they know that although we don't see things the same and I might have beaten that dead horse deader than dead in an argument, that I enjoyed the debate.  I also know that I am no better than anyone.  I am where I am only because of God's grace.  I hope and pray that I am kind to people - especially those I am diametrically opposed to - and that we can find a common ground.

Today and everyday I am thankful...

91. That because he has loved and forgiven me, I can love and forgive (and be loved and forgiven) 

Matthew 18: 33-35
33 Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ 34 In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. 35 “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.”

Matthew 20:16
16 “So the last will be first, and the first will be last.”

Matthew 22:37-40
37 Jesus replied: “ ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’a 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’b 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

92. For riding with the windows down listening to music

93. For Tennessee Williams

94. For new books (Holt's new books that is) It's book fair time and he brought home 3 new ones we got to read last night.

95. For Jane Cannon's cooing - she has really started doing some serious talking

96. That Jonathan got a shiny new truck - courtesy of Helena

97. That Jonathan has taken over making Holt's lunch every morning

98. for One of my favorite Sports Articles of all time - Medora goes to the game.  If you haven't read it you really should.  

99. For the Department of Languages and Literature at Delta State

100. For John Prine